Zachary:
We had our first full day of visits today. This morning we watched Zhenya the caretaker give Kai a massage while I learned how to use the video camera. I finally feel like one of those dads at Disneyworld who films every moment of the vacation. All I need are the plaid shorts jacked up to my armpits, kneehigh tube socks (mocha brown), big sunglasses, a 'Goofy' hat and - dare I say- a minivan. Hmmm...
I'm pleased to say Kai is taking quite a liking to us. He loves to be held. He just sits back, looks around in wonder and smiles. He is very alert and makes eye contact often. He's learned how to use the sippy cup even if he's a little aggressive with it, drinks too much and spits some up.
We were actually glad to see that he cried for the first time when we put him back in his crib for naptime. I think it was a combination of us leaving (or just being put down), and being overtired. We don't want to get the impression that he's perfect. Scratch that. He is perfect.
Aida, our driver and interpreter extraordinaire, brought us back to the apartment where her mother made us lunch. The apartment we're renting belongs to Aida's mom. After lunch we had our second two hour visit of the day.
We brought Kai outside to the courtyard where the afternoon sun beats down hard. It's very hot and dry here, like North Fork, California. Luckily they have a shaded open air room to the side of the courtyard where we sat with Kai. Other infants and a couple toddlers were wobbling around. This one little boy is so sweet. He is fascinated by me. I don't think he's seen men before and is intrigued by the low voice. He keeps running up to me and handing me his toys. I'd say 'spaseeba' fuzzy little guy (thank you fuzzy little guy)) and balance a toy on the top of his head. He seems to get a big kick out of that.
The other children don't seem to smile or talk much. Nor do they really cry. Sometimes you hear a short wail, then they quiet right down. I think they've learned that crying doesn't really get them anywhere. The caretakers' hands are so full, they can't possibly attend to all the children who cry. After awhile, the babies don't get much of a response, so they don't cry. This is probably one of the reasons many of them are behind in their verbal skills. The younger and older kids tend to mimic eachother with "aaah" sounds and grunts rather than the caretakers, who do speak to them often.
Though it's hard not to pay complete attention to Kai, I try to give the other children some loving. Many are eager for hugs and attention. There was an infant wrapped in a blanket in a stroller during the afternoon who, unfortunately, has spinabifida (sp?). Very sad to look around the room at so many children and wonder what their lives will be like. Will they get adopted? Will they grow up in the orphanage system? I wish we could adopt more of them, but...
We can only focus on Kai now. And we're grateful for him.
April:
We had a great day today. When we got there this morning, Kai was having his "Treatment, " which, as far as we could tell, involved wrapping him in a blanket and strapping him to a board. He didn't seem to mind though and was very happy to see us, even if it was awkward holding his stiff little body. When they unwrapped him we saw that the "Treatment" was actually a clay poultice they use to encourage circulation and which helps their skin. I wholeheartedly approve of their natural techniques, especially since it means they get 1-on-1 time with their caretakers. After his unveiling, he was off to the massage room for his daily rub-down with Zhenya, who some of you may recognize from his referral video. He adores her, but really, what man wouldn't love a little after-breakfast massage from a beautiful woman who whispers sweet-nothings in your ear?
The afternoon visit was excellent, he was really into being held and cuddled. I just have to mention here what a hit Zach is with all the kids in this babyhouse. Even the caretakers are noticing that the babies, and especially the toddlers, LOVE him. He has a really nice, non-threatening way around him, and then there is the fact that he is a total goof-ball, which any kid will immediately recognize as an excellent quality in another human being!
The toddlers are sweet, but it is heartbreaking to see how delayed they are verbally. The are clearly smart, and curious, but as Zach said, unusually quiet. The little girl with Spinabifida was so sweet, and it was very hard to hear that she will not live very long. The lump on her spine, or rather the lump her spine made, was enormous. She was very happy to have some love and kisses though, and she is doted on by all the caretakers, they all adore her.
It is summer vacation here, and the shouts and laughter of the neighborhood kids as they play all day long is a great thing to hear. Right now there are 2 little boys laying a primitive game of batchi ball outside our window, and I can picture them, years from now, still playing the game in the evenings, though hopefully by then they will have graduated from rocks to an actual ball set.
On another note, thanks so much to everyone who has left us messages and sent us their good wishes. It means so much to us. To the other adoptive families, your support has been really overwhelming, and we are so grateful to you all. Please, please don't hesitate to contact us if you have any questions at all. We are going to go play Boggle now, and I have every intention of kicking Zach's butt. Tomorrow afternoon there may be a trip to the water park. yippeee!
